Learning a language is difficult. I have tried to conquer Spanish and Portuguese with mild success but have really struggled with English since I was born and still haven't mastered it. I've become increasingly aware that I will never know all of the nuances of communicating through this imperfect medium the Germanic Anglo-Saxons bequeathed to us and the Scandinavians and French Normans augmented. The biggest question is which brand of English do I use? There are so many versions:
Scottish English--
- Whaur dae ye bide? meaning "Where do you live?"
- a-wiz-nae. meaning, "I was not."
- I'll see you up the road meaning "I'll come with you some of the way" or "I'll see you back at home"
- I'm gaun for the messages meaning "I'm going shopping for groceries."
- Are you thinkin' o' flitting? meaning "Are you thinking of moving house?"
- Gie's a shot then! meaning "Let me have a turn now" (for example, children playing).
- Quinees meaning a girl.
- Loonies meaning a boy.
- Are ye goin' tuh the kirk? meaning, "Are you going to church.
- Are yuh gettin'? meaning "May I help you?"
- On yer bike! meaning "Get out of here."
- Right crooked." meaning someone is very cranky.
- Play the Irish banjo. meaning dig a hole with a shovel.
- Face like a Lurgan spade, meaning a long, sad, miserable face. A Lurgan spade is a peat shovel with a long narrow blade.
- Cup a scald, meaning a cup of tea.
- Me da, my father.
- Quare good, meaning very good.
- Lorry meaning truck.
- Bonnet meaning a car's hood.
- Apples and Pears, meaning stairs.
- Cheerio, meaning good bye.
- Chuffed, meaning please or happy.
- Dodgy, sketchy or not quite right.
- Drop a clanger, meaning to do something incredibly embarrassing.
- Flog, meaning to sell something,
- Nick, meaning to steal something.
- Snog, meaning kissing.
- Rubbish, meaning garbage or something that is trashy or nonsense.
Canadian English--- Cowtown--meaning the city of Calgary.
- Chinook--meaning a warm westerly wind that blows east from British Columbia over the Rocky Mountains rapidly warming the temperature in the foothills.
- Click--meaning, slang for kilometer.
- Garburator--meaning a Garbage disposal.
- Hosed--meaning angry.
- Hydro--refers to electricity.
- Loonie--meaning the Canadian dollar coin.
- Mickie--meaning a pint of hard liquor.
- Runners--Refers to any kind of athletic footwear.
- Take off--meaning, "Get outta here!"
- Two-four- Slang for a 24 pack of beer
Australian English--
- away with the pixies--meaning dreaming.
- bag of fruit-meaning a suit.
- belt up--meaning in an angry way, stop talking and be quiet.
- chuck a U-e--meaning make a U-turn.
- crack a tinnie--meaning open a can of cold beer.
- fair dinkum--meaning someone who is really genuine.
- a goog--meaning a large bump the size of an egg.
- the wog--meaning the flu.
- nackered--meaning someone is absolutely exhausted.
- nick off--meaning get out of here.
- put a snag on the barbie--meaning put a sausage on the barbeque.
New Zealand English--
- spit the dummy –meaning throw a tantrum.
- bit of a dag –meaning a person with a good sense of humor.
- squizz –meaning to take or ask for a look at something.
- munted –meaning damaged beyond repair.
- snarler –meaning a sausage.
- scarfie –meaning a university student.
- chook –meaning a chicken.
- scrogin –meaning a trail mix of nuts and raisins.
- rellies–meaning relatives.
- scull –meaning to drink quickly.
- bubble and squeak –meaning re–cooked leftovers.
- kiwi –meaning New Zealander.
Indian English--- acting pricey -- meaning playing "hard to get", being snobbish.
- bus stand -- meaning a bus station or bus stop.
- carrying -- meaning to be pregnant, as in "She is carrying".
- club -- meaning to merge or put two things together. "Just club it together."
- cooling glasses -- meaning sunglasses
- crib -- meaning to complain.
- hall -- meaning the living room.
- on the anvil -- term often used in the Indian press to mean something is about to appear or happen.
- pass out -- meaning graduating, as in "I passed out of the university in 1995".
- under scanner--Term often used in the Indian press to mean something is being investigated by authorities.
South African English--- takkies or tekkie'--meaning sneakers.
- combi -- meaning a small van.
- bakkie -- meaning a pick-up truck.
- kiff -- meaning pleasurable.
- lekker -- meaning nice.
- donga -- meaning a gully.
- braai -- meaning barbecue
- jol -- meaning a party.
Pakistani English--- brown Sahib--meaning natives of South Asia who imitate Western - typically English - lifestyle.
- chop chop--meaning meals or just food.
- desi--meaning the people, cultures, and products of the Indian sub-continent including India and Pakistan
- dacoity--meaning criminal activity involving robbery by groups of armed bandits.
- hafta--slang for the protection money collected periodically by gangsters and corrupt policemen.
- pukka sahib--meaning "first class", "absolutely genuine" and "true gentleman" or "excellent fellow".
- do the needful--meaning "do that which is necessary", with the respectful implication that the other party is trusted to understand what needs doing without being given detailed instruction.
- mafia raj--meaning a criminalized nexus (or "mafia") of government officials, elected politicians, business interests and other entities (such as law-enforcement authorities, non-governmental organizations, trade unions or criminal organizations)
- qaum--meaning refer to a community of people who share a common language, culture, ethnicity, descent, and/or history.
Nigerian English--- yama -- meaning spoiled.
- kolo -- meaning crazy.
- baffs -- meaning fashionable clothes.
- yawa -- meaning big trouble.
- razz -- meaning an obnoxious individual who try desperately hard to fit in.
- jaga jaga -- meaning scattered or out of place.
- ojoro -- meaning to accomplish objectives by methods of a fraudulent nature.
If I pick American English then which version do I use? There are so many: (Click on one for more information)
In Short there is quite a lot of different English dialects both in and outside the US from which to choose:
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It's all so confusing and I won't even get into the the blending together of the Utah English I learned from birth, the Guatemalan Spanish I learned on a Mission for the LDS Church, and the Brazilian Portuguese I learned as a Mission President for the Church into a unique language that I have come to fondly call Portuñol.
Which ever one you use be sure to,
WATCH YOU LANGUAGE!
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